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On my healing journey not feeling good enough has been a real struggle for me. No matter how many approvals, recognitions and even awards in my professional career I would get, that feeling wouldn’t change. It is like one of my core programs and to reprogram it has been taking me years and honestly, I am still not feeling 100% good enough … maybe like 81% would be a correct number to describe it.
And I am so pleased with myself that from 0% I am today at 81%. However, it didn’t happen from one day to another it took me over 10 years to be where I am now in this state of being. I am grateful that when I don’t feel good enough, I can understand now that this is my currently healing mind pattern and that it does not define me. In truth, ‘not good enough’ doesn’t exist, and to get to the point where we no longer feel that way and instead, we feel aligned with our true self and therefore feeling I AM good enough, is a huge blessing. The reasons why we might feel that way will differ from story to story but again we can probably find the roots in our childhood, in the events from the past which left us traumatized. The reason why is not as important as the determination not to be a slave of this mind program and to not identify with this thought. You are an infinite being. Once you decide to stop this torture, you might remember significant times in your life which made you feel that way. When you start remembering all these events or one, allow yourself to feel the pain and any other emotions. Let yourself cry, laugh… express whatever is coming through you. When you are ready you will move on at your own pace towards healing the “never good enough” mind trick in small but brave steps. There is no need to rush, take your time. Healing is never about speed but about depth.
Have you ever felt blocked from living the life you want by feeling not good enough?
Well, I certainly have. I avoided many things in my life in false ego beliefs about myself. I literally felt paralysed to express my creativity, my skills and talents.
I am not good enough say this or that, who would want my opinion?! I am not good enough to share my philosophy, ideas, inspirational thoughts…. There are so many amazing people out there already doing everything, why would I even try, anyway I am not good enough to succeed…blah blah.
The feeling of not being good enough can be also initiated by comparison to others.
Let me tell you this. LIFE IS NOT A COMPETITION. We cannot compare ourselves to other people and to what they are doing or not doing. We are all unique with beautiful ways of personalised expression. No one is better or worse than you are. We are just all different and that is amazing. This is what we have to embrace.
I have been writing for many years to myself and really wanted to share it with others because I had this little inner voice telling me that it could possible help people who might go through the same or similar things, but unfortunately, I couldn’t because my fearful mind won the battle with my heart which was suggesting this step.
Until recently it was true, I felt this weird block within me. Now, I fully feel that I am SO GOOD ENOUGH to live freely with an open heart and open mind and express myself in many creative ways. I AM GOOD ENOUGH to be my true and authentic self.
And you know what? If I could change my good enough mindset, you can too. Moreover, if you know you are good enough, then automatically you know what you deserve …. You deserve to be healthy, happy, cheerful and to enjoy life!
With all my love,